One of the characteristics of masterful coaching is the lightness of the coach’s presence. There’s a naturalness, and an ease in the flow between coach and client. And one primary reason for this is the coach stops trying so hard.
So my point: Don’t over think it.
Another one of the secrets they don’t tell you in coaching school:
The truth is, it’s hard to really screw up in coaching.
As long as you:
1) Let go of the need to be The One Who Knows, and –
2) Genuinely care about your client’s development more than Getting To The Answer, then –
You will bring value to your clients because of the quality of your presence.
Yes, of course, mind your p’s and q’s, ethically speaking. Don’t go where you don’t have expertise to go. In fact, let go of being an expert all together.
In coaching, it is NOT your role to know the answers.
Instead, trust the wisdom and discernment you already bring simply because of who you are. Let that and your huge heart be enough (because they are!), and allow yourself to absorb the technology of coaching along the way.
Masterful coaching is much more about the quality of your presence than anything else. You can ask questions that are technically powerful, you can reflect your listening and you can hold people accountable for being in action BUT – and this is a really big but – how you are being as you are present with your client is what will make the difference.
Your deepest, most insightful listening and your most powerful intuitive questions will stem directly from the degree of connection between you and your client. This connection is based in how you are present.
So, will you ever be a masterful coach? Honey, odds are, you already are in some respect(s), especially when you allow your natural strengths and gifts to shine freely. The most masterful coaches leverage their natural strengths and gifts seamlessly within the competencies of coaching.
Bottom line:
- Stop worrying about Getting It Right and enjoy the sacred connection between you and your client.
- Delight in exploring your natural strengths and gifts, and the message you bring to the world.
- Along the way, continue to develop your coaching skills as an organic expression of who you are vs. a framework you have to fit into.
And if you want to help your natural strengths and gifts flourish in a truly artful – yet technically proficient – expression of coaching, you’ll definitely find a home in Coaching With Love.
